Lisa 1980

Thinking back there have been a handful that I have never forgot, whose aura still lingers after all these years, Lisa is one. Let me take you back to a time in Los Angeles, 1980. At the time I was a struggling media person, I had spent two years in radio, made a lot of contacts, got a few good breaks, but money was tight. I was working as an Airborne Traffic Reporter during the day, doing small events in a new media called Video, for which I got some additional bucks, and to pay the rent I would take jobs in restaurants where at least the money was steady. It was at one of these restaurants, I was waiting tables on an 18th birthday party. It was obvious they were used to wealth, they showed deference, were polite, how people used to money are, and they were gracious enough to ask about me. When it came time to pay, they had Lisa, the birthday girl sign, and under her signature on their copy she wrote her phone number. In front of her family with a little teasing she asked me to call her. Very classy.

A few days later I called her and arranged lunch down by the beach where I lived. She arrived on time dressed smartly, fresh faced and cheerful. We stroll down to a local cafe and there I started to learn about Lisa. Her mother was a well known Art Critic, her stepdad Ed was NASA engineer, they lived in Pasadena, in the old money part. Lisa was average or a bit below average height, beautiful complexion, blue eyes and page boy haircut. She was girlish in a humorous, silly way, like many she liked the B52s Rock Lobster silliness, the mixture of fashion and foolishness. She wore tasteful expensive jewelery, Pearl necklace and a ring her grandmother gave her.

After lunch we walk back to my apartment, she allowed me to hold her hand crossing the road, didn't pull away when I touched her. On reaching the apartment leaving the door open to have the sea breezes come in, I leaned over and kissed her, reaching down gently running my hand over her breasts. She didn't object as the buttons were opened, or my hand slide between her legs. She had come to have sex. We moved to the bedroom, I removed her clothes, she was naked, yet had made no effort to other than kiss and hold me. I laid her down on the bed, spread her legs, her skin was soft and pink her pubic hair shaved tight. I began licking her, she tasted clean and healthy. Standing up I removed my clothes put my cock in her mouth, and thrust it in and out. She was a novice, I made myself come and made sure she swallowed. We climbed between the sheets, her confidence rising as she rested on my shoulder. She told me her mother was impressed I offered lunch, it showed class, I wondered what she would think if she saw us now. Then she told me about Frank, her next door neighbor, an older guy, who got her drunk and took advantage of her. Her parents were mad at Frank. I now understood that they thought Lisa should block that memory by finding someone she liked as a positive experience. It was my first run in with the progressive, therapy driven mentality that was part of this families thought processes. I looked down at her sweet face, rolled over on top of her, kissed her and entered her, holding her tight as I came inside. She was worried because she had a cold sore on her lip, my response was to make love to her again. The afternoon has been unexpected and relaxed, I liked her, and as I was later to find out she had fallen in love with me. I was her first real love, her first not counting Frank.

Knowing her background, I wasn't expecting much, class like her was always in high demand. But she called the next day, and we set up another date.... dinner with her family.
Their house was large, the walls covered in original art, they showed me the Rauschenbergs, the Lichensteins, deKoonings and many more, not only that, as I learned from their conversation these famous and very trendy artists were their friends. They came to the house, like I did for dinner. The conversation was wonderful, the company gracious, and they were pleased that their daughter was dating an educated, if somewhat penniless guy. Lisa liked it too, she also liked my good looks and British accent. It was supercool for some reason, women were constantly telling me they loved my voice. They would go out with me and say just talk and most of the time I did, then at the end of the evening with me still talking they would put my cock inside themselves then closed their eyes and fuck me. Soon, Lisa would do the same.

The dinners led to being guest of honor at Art Functions and other events, but in the meantime I was pulling back, I felt out of place, coming from a class conscious country I sensed I was a Boy Toy, a sex novelty to a young upper class girl. There was nothing I could offer Lisa, except in my mind sex and the envy of her friends, lower class down and dirty sex. So I made a point of having gutter sex with Lisa, the sort girls whisper about to their Private School Friends, in public places, in the front of my car, sometimes just lifted her dress and screwed her while she talked on the phone, on a whim. She never objected, she swallowed my cum obediently, licked my butt when told to do so. One day I made her kneel on the bed, I pushed my cock into her ass, no lubrication, and fucked her hard while fingering her pussy. The second time she told me it hurt, I apologized, the truth was I had never done it before, but did not want to tell her. Instead I took time licking, putting my finger inside, using her feces for lubrication. She cottoned on quickly, often coming to me already smeared, sometimes I would lick it then make her do the same to me, she never said no. I realized that I was pushing this to see how far I could make her go before she said no, or I can't do that, but that time never came.
She was going away to college, and secretly I was pleased, she would meet some upper class guy in Santa Barbara, and become his girl, I could then hide myself from the feelings of not being in her league. I have always wanted people to accept me for what I was, and what I was, was a struggling media person, with some contacts in the music business who would have to do it the hard way. I didn't want to be seen being a hanger on, looking for favors, I was just too proud. Also she was innocent and silly, she didn't know I had had the clap, screwed many women, though she often told me she regarded me as her sexual mentor, her trainer in the art of lovemaking. As a defensive mechanism, when she went away to college, I let her call, she would tell me she called late I was not home. I told her I was working some project which was true, a video presentation, or at a restaurant. Soon the calls became less frequent. We arranged to meet when she came home to visit, to continue her training, but I noticed a change. She was sweet and willing to please but there was somethingelse bothering her. I didn't press it, instead I buried my tongue between her smeared cheeks and licked her clean, and made her do the same. Eventually she told me, she had met a guy, she thought I'd be mad, I said I wasn't, she was at college, but deep, deep down I knew this is what I was preparing myself for. In response she took my dick in her mouth sucked, swallowed and kissed me. I told her she was a fast learner.

One day I got a call from her mother asking me for a special favor, would I mind escorting Lisa to her debutante ball. There was two ways I could take it, see it as a chance to rub shoulders with Pasadena's elite, or I could see it through my prism of class. I was hired as a high end male escort with a British accent. They didn't know I was having sex with her, and I figured they saw me an an ornament, a well spoken good looking Brit, that would go well with the chandliers. Her mother could sense I knew what I was being asked, I had asked nothing from them and she was sensitive to my feelings. She knew that I understood the class system, and what debutante balls were about, finding the right partner for an upper class girl. I had gone to many of these events in England, I knew from experience that when I would get there everyone would be polite, but, if they hadn't met me at the Country Club, I was probably not worth knowing, just rented for the night like the tuxedo I wore and returned soon after.
I wondered why Lisa had not asked her boyfriend at college. I found out later. The night of the debutant ball was everything I dreaded, I was an ornament sitting at a table, until a very attractive blue eyed blond, with large breasts asked me if I was an actor, she was convinced she had seen me on stage in London Play, she remembered me. It was a come on line and I knew it. She was here as an ornament as well, she lived in Westwood, upscale, but not old money. I had had a few drinks, I suggested going for a walk somewhere dark, we found a place we thought was quiet, started making out, fonding her large breasts, and very wet pussy, we kissed passionately, she rubbed my cocked, the feel of her body and the smell of her pussy on my hands turned me on, I rubbed myself hard against her and came. The sound of voices made us stop. I didn't care, I was angry at this whole event and angry at myself for being there, for being little better than a low class male hooker for a debutante. After awhile we started to drift back, and decided that maybe we should both go find our dates. Back in the main hall at the Country Club, Lisa came up to me, "where were you", she asked, "I was taking some air with one of the guests". She said a school friend had seen me making out with a girl. I told her wrong guy, I was having a very involved conversation with a girl who was emotionally distraught, and I was comforting her, he may have misunderstood. "That's not how he described it", who told you I asked, she named a guy, he's had a crush on me since high school. He was jealous, that's all I told her.

Feeling bad I decided it was time to start being the classy escort I was supposed to be. I sat with her sister. Very different from Lisa, pointed features, future model type, when she spoke she put her hand on my thigh, then "accidently" on my cock. Then began telling me all her gripes with her debutante sister, ending with taking my hand and putting it on her thigh, very high on her thigh, panty high. I gently fondled her pussy, I had no interest in her, I was just acting the role, the male escort, available to meet the needs of this wealthy and well heeled family, a sex toy with an accent.

As the party winded down we were invited to a late night drinks session at a friends house, just the young people invited. I was being driven in a group of wild young upper crusters, I started kissing Lisa in the back, most were drunk and did not care. I also felt guilty, this was her night and I wanted to make it special. The rain was pouring outside, a late summer late night thunderstorm. When we got to the house everyone jumped out of the car, I grabbed Lisa arm as she began to run. Kissed her, we were soaking wet, I leaned her back against the the hood of the car, lifted her white party dress, pulled off her slip and panties, spread her legs, and with all the party staring out the window, fucked her in the pouring rain. I was doing my job, and I felt I had made it up to her, put those rumors to bed. It was also a way to get back at that love obsessed prick who snitched on me, I fucked her then kissed her for a long time until we were soaked to the skin. Lisa glowed, she laughed, and loved it, in my mind it would make her the talk and envy of her Private School friends. Sex in public in the pouring rain, during her coming out party, beat that. We stayed up late, returned home to parents tired, and fell fast asleep fully clothed. Which was where her mother found us in the morning, my arm around her, she spooning tightly into my crotch.

A few days later Lisa called, her mother had started asking questions, and Lisa admitted she had sex, how could she not, many of her neighbors had seen her performance with their own eyes. Then Lisa added something which hit like a Thunderbolt. "I told her", she said " I am madly in love with you". Are you I asked. Yes she said, from the day I met you.
When the call ended, I realized I had been wrong, the anal sex without lubrication, the having sex in public was not some game for an upper class girl, but that of someone who was madly in love, who wanted to please. I began thinking about how she would feel when her sister teased her about being fondled, or the date of the Westwood girl tell her I was quite the stud and I began to think about the times I had pushed her away, and been short with her, how much that would hurt. She was going back to college, and I didn't want her to go, she was a sweet, fun, classy girl who had made me her first love, and I had acted like a sleaze bag. As the weeks passed other thoughts came to me, her family would have reached out. Had I played my cards right it would have got me production projects with the top museums in LA and maybe New York, where I could use my professional talents. They had liked me. I could leave this hardscrabble existence, and use my talents to build a business moving among movers and shakers, and well educated, refined people, instead of the music video hanger on crowd of Heavy Metal and New Wave. I had totally blown it, but maybe I could make it up to her.
I started to call her at college, at first she replied quickly, then it was days late. I went up to see her. Coming back from dinner one night we met some of her friends. Back in the car, she told me, that they had invited her to an orgy last weekend. "Did you go" I asked, sensing something in my voice, she did not reply, "no, silly", but it didn't ring true. The word had spread, she puts out, get her in mood and she will play. The return calls became less frequent, and I criticized her thoughtlessness. One evening on a visit home we went out on a date, she said she had to get home and couldn't stay the night. We had sex and she left. I was woken the following morning, it was her mother on the phone, was Lisa there. No, I said she went home about 11 pm. Later I got a call from Lisa she apologized, and started to explain she was having difficulties. Then, I realized something I deeply cared for her, she was hurting. I asked to meet but she said no, maybe in awhile. Some weeks later we met for lunch. She started explaining about her boyfriend at college, whatever she did it was wrong or not good enough, she would try harder to please. He sounded like he was a jerk. He played with her insecurities and persuaded her to do things to make him happy like accepting invites to parties. Lisa explained she was the daughter of an alcoholic father, an ex VP of a large Bank, who when he came home raging drunk, would scream at the kids, beat his wife. Lisa always believed she somehow was responsible. So she was always trying to make things right. She had grown up to believe that any issue was her fault. Her parents had sent her to therapy. I hated myself. I could have loved her properly, built that esteem, but instead, I had contributed to her being bullied into orgies, being made a play thing for a guy who knew how to press the right buttons. In therapy, she would tell about the sex in public and more, the girl at the ball and her sister's come on. The therapist would tell her and her parents, that she needed to keep away from people like that. I had been given a precious gift, the first real love, and I had squandered it, I told her that she was terrific, kind and caring, she said, she needed to change her thinking to protect herself.

About a year later, the phone rang it was Lisa, she was nearby and asked if she could stop by. I was thrilled and excited, when she arrived I hugged her, she laughed, moved my hands from her and sat down. We talked for a long while, then I told her, that I had fallen for her, and hated losing her. She laughed, she thanked me for what she had learned, and the therapy had made her a stronger person, no longer the easy giving and loving person I once knew. It was necessary for her survival, she needed to grow up. I realized that I had lost her forever. She had come to test herself, and found that she felt nothing for a guy full of self pity and self recrimination. We never spoke again.